How do you get a person who is lying to themselves so convincingly, to tell the truth? Even when confronted with truth, he spends so much energy to manufacture circumstances to fit the lies. To so emphatically insist that the lies are the truth. How do you break through when he has so much invested in these lies that he probably doesn't even admit it to himself. It makes me doubtful and full of silence--because anything I say becomes an argument of he said/she said. Everything can be explained away.
But I know, in my deepest of subconscious, that it isn't the truth.
That blaming nameless hackers or vengeful enemies is so easy to do with no way to prove otherwise. Does that make me just some suspicious, paranoid, trustless ice queen? Or someone who is content to live in denial also, just to avoid the confrontation? Because I know if the confrontation happened, it would just result in more lies. I have no faith that he will admit anything without overwhelming proof. I am emotionally dead at this point. Because feeling anything would mean fighting and I have no more energy to fight. The fight has gone out of me.
This is what he has made me.
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